A notable shift is underway in the dating market, as a growing number of singles, frustrated by the perceived inefficiencies and financial outlays of digital platforms, are turning to in-real-life (IRL) events for connection. This pivot, driven by ‘app fatigue’ and a demand for greater ‘return on investment’, signals a re-evaluation of how individuals allocate their time and money in the pursuit of companionship.
The Economic Imperative of IRL Connection
For many, the decision to engage with dating events is rooted in economic rationale. Olivia Miller-Davis, a 28-year-old attending a dating event in Guildford, articulated a common sentiment, noting that money plays a significant factor in her dating priorities. She recalled putting dating on hold during a career change, feeling it ‘couldn’t be a priority’ until she was ‘earning enough’. This perspective is not isolated; a survey by Barclays indicated that more than a quarter of daters reported rising costs had altered their dating habits. Recent studies further suggest the monthly cost of dating, encompassing apps, entertainment, and attire, can accumulate to approximately £130.
Attendees at the Guildford event frequently cited ‘better value for money’ as a key advantage of IRL gatherings. These events, typically priced between £15 and £30, often include a drink or an icebreaking activity, offering a tangible experience for a cost comparable to a single date arranged through an app. Candice Gallagher, an entrepreneur who runs the @Candilicious account and recently attended ten dating events in as many weeks, framed the shift in business terms, asserting that dating events deliver ‘much greater return on investment’ compared to online interactions.
App Fatigue and Diminishing Digital Returns
The move away from digital platforms is largely fueled by widespread ‘app fatigue’. Olivia Miller-Davis described her frustration with ‘endlessly swiping’ and ‘judging people with ‘really limited information and just a couple of pictures”, feeling she couldn’t ‘really fully commit’ with such scant data. Edward, another participant at the Guildford event, echoed this sentiment, stating, ‘I’m fed up with apps’. He critically observed that apps are ‘designed so that you don’t find ‘the one’, because they want you to come back and use the app forever’.
Data from online regulator Ofcom indicates that while 11% of adults use dating sites, the time spent on these platforms is declining. Usage peaked at nearly four hours a month in 2023 but dropped to three hours last year, suggesting a decrease in user engagement. Candice Gallagher highlighted the prevalence of ‘chat graveyards’ in online dating, where conversations are ‘very limited’, contrasting this with the higher probability of ‘having a good conversation’ at an event where ‘everyone is single, everyone’s ready to mingle’.
The Resurgence of In-Person Engagement
The appeal of IRL dating events is multifaceted. Lissy Cleminson, Director of Events for Love at First Sign, a company that organizes such gatherings, noted that changes in work patterns since Covid, particularly increased home working, have reduced organic ‘meet-cutes’ in traditional settings like offices or commutes. This creates a vacuum that structured dating events are filling.
These events provide a curated environment for singles to interact, often incorporating icebreakers like the astrology-based app used by Love at First Sign. The growing popularity is also reflected in social media, with numerous #SingleTok and #Singlelife accounts on platforms like TikTok and Instagram reviewing dating events, further amplifying their visibility and perceived value.
Market Adaptation by Digital Giants
The shift in consumer preference has not gone unnoticed by major players in the dating app industry. Match Group, the parent company of Tinder and Hinge, acknowledges the enduring role of online platforms, with their research indicating that 20% of surveyed individuals met their most recent partner on a dating app, matching the 20% who met through friends. However, their data also reveals generational differences: 21% of baby boomers met their most recent partner at a pub, bar, or club, compared to just 4% of Gen Z.
In response to the demand for IRL connections, Match Group is adapting its offerings. Chine Mmegwa, head of strategy, corporate development and operations at Match Group, stated that Tinder has introduced features like ‘double date mode’ and is actively launching events across the US and UK. She emphasized the strategy to ‘bring IRL experiences into the app’ and ‘put IRL into our experience’, aiming to bridge the gap between digital discovery and in-person interaction.
The evolving landscape of dating reflects a broader consumer trend towards experiences that offer perceived authenticity and tangible value. As singles increasingly weigh the financial and emotional costs of digital engagement against the immediate, interactive benefits of IRL events, the dating market is responding with hybrid models and a renewed focus on in-person connection. This dynamic suggests a future where both digital platforms and physical gatherings will compete and collaborate to meet the diverse needs of daters, with a clear emphasis on delivering a more fulfilling and cost-effective path to partnership.
